Days have passed and i still didn't receive a reply or any message from Zaid, i decided that i wont send him anything anymore, kelsh mala da3y adz 3gb ma 7egarny
I was sitting having my regular after noon tea with my lovely parents
:YOUUUBA!!
Baba jumped from his seat, trying to figure out the voice was coming from where
Moments later me7sn entered the room looking furious
Mama: haw haw haw shfeek me7sn khebaa9t galbna, shfeek t9arkh
Me7sn: youma meta kntaw naweeen etgolonly ina 7e9a makh6ooba??!!!
I choked on the tea that i was drinking from
Baba: mnu galk enha makh6oba?
Me7sn: youba el kel yadry!
Mama: ghala6 hal 7achy, ekhtk mo makh6ooba
Me7sn: 3ayal laish el kel eygol ena khaled al x kha6ebha?
Me: waaaaaaaai3 waai3 akher 3omry aketh hatha? Me7sn tara wala ana mo makh6ooba wala shay, w enta shlon em9adg? matadre ena 7atan law kent makh6oba ent knt btkon mn awal el nas ely yadron?
Me7sn: eh 9a7, bas ishlon intshar ilkhabar?
I turned around to face baba
Me: baba laykoon lail7en ma radayt 3la 3amy hamad
Baba: intay laish mu9era ena matabena?
Me: umbay ma9adg jad
I stood to go to my room but said: baba laish mo gader testaw3b ena ana ma aby?
Baba: bas lasm etfakren feny ana ba3ad, shagol 7ag ilrayal? ana ga3d agoolch, w mo ga3d akheth rayech, byoona ba3ad cham yom 3ashan etshofon ba3ath, w hatha akher kalam 3endy
Maryam wanted to say something, bas feeh shay kan yemna3ha, 7asat ena she didn't have the right to speak
Me crying: atmana law omy kanat hny, walah law shno kanat ra7 tertha bely enta ga3d etsawy feeny, may9er etgha9bny 3ala shay ana ma abyyy, enta al7een ma taby tetfashal men refeejk, baas akher shay ana ely bakelha, ba3eesh wya wa7d ana maa abyy, 7aram 3laik baba wala 7aram, akher wa7d tewaqa3ta eysawy chethy feeny ohw ent
I ran off to my room
I stuffed my face in the pillow and cried my heart out, its not his decision, he cant do this to me
10 minutes later maryam entered my room
She hugged me and said: shhhh baas 7abeebty latabchen mo zaain
Me: shloon ma abchy w oboy chethy esawy feeny, may9eer yagh9bny wala may9eer
Maryam: khalas ensay 3an hal mawtho3, ana te9araft
Me: shlon
Maryam: geltla maly ga3da eb hal bait etha entay khathaytay khaled
I looked at her in complete shock
Me: mn9ejch
Maryam: eh laish mn9adma?
Me: madre bas ya3ny laish kentay btsawen kel hatha 7agy, ya3ny adre ena te3tabrainy bntch w chthy, bas bel 9ej ana mo bntch, ya3ny kntay ra7 tkharben baynch w bain oboy 3ashany ana
Maryam: lana ana 3yaly khsaraw obohom, w adre shnu ey7son feh, w magdar atkhayal entay shkether m7taja omch, kh9oo9an ina ma3ndch khawat, fa mara7 akoon murt obo na7eesa w a2athech, bel 3aks, ana ba3amlch methel banaty bel thab6, w ra7 a7awl ina a7asesch ena ana omch, w ena elshay ely oboch tawa sawa 7ayl ghlaa6 w ana ma artha feh, fa khalas ensay salfat khaled lana mara7 eyeee
I hugged her and cried even more, i finally after 3 years of torture and hurt, felt a little live piece of my mama, i felt like the hole in my heart was somewhat filled, i felt that i really do have someone in my life, god gave a step brother who couldn't treat me any better, i actually start to tell me people that he is just my brother, i'd be more than proud to call this woman my half mother, she's the most amazing thing that happened to me and my father after mama left.
Maryam stayed a while with me then left, i felt a bit relieved
By 7 o'clock lulu picked me up and we went to have dinner
Lulu: haaa 7e9oo wain zaaid
I swallowed my burger then said: w ana shako feh
Pathetic me, i'd pretend that i dont care, that i dont want to know why he's acting this way, when deep down inside of me, is a burning fire, wanting to know absolutely everything.
I'd check his tweets on a daily base, before i sleep and as i wake up, sometimes i'd read them during the day, i thank god he isn't private on twitter
Lulu: ohhhh
Me: emm lulu?
Lulu: haa
Me: a7ba
Lulu almost chocked as i said it
Lulu: haw haw haw intay shetkharb6een
Me: tawny astaw3b iny a7ba, wala a7ba lulu, a7s ena ana mo ana al7eeen, 9arly taqreeban sbo3ain mo mkalmta, faj2a ge6a3 mn ghair ay sbab, walah madre laish galby ey3awrny 7ayl
Lulu: w ana laish tawny adre
Me: lana tawny astaw3b hal shay
Lulu: okay kalmy w goleela shfeek w madre shnu
Me: la mala da3y, shbygol 3any ba3dain
Lulu: ya3ny shbygol
Me: bygol hathy malat w galat khal asolf wya zaid w awans ro7y, chethy byfaker wala
Lulu: umbay shako
Me: walaa
A week has passed, i just went out of my class and i haven't seen zaid since that day, i miss him a lot, more than you can ever imagine, even though i haven't spent that much time with him, but i still miss him, he has become an important person in my life
I was walking to the car when a girl i don't know approached to me
Girl: elsalam
Me: wa3alaikom elsalam
Girl: ymkn entay mat3arfeny, ana cousin khaled kha6eebch, bas yeeet w 7abayt abarklch
Me: shnu, ay kha6eeb entay shga3da tgoleen
Girl: weeh entay mo hessa al x?
Me: ambala ana ehya, bas ana mo makh6oba
Girl: haw ambala
Me: la2, ahal khaled dagaw 3ala ahaly bas e7na refathna, ana wya mo makh6oobeen w raja2an tgolen 7ag kel ely t3arfeenhom ena hal kalam mo 9ej
Girl: umm okayy...
I left her and hoped in the car, that jerk. Shlon yetjara2 wy6al3 rumor 3any w 3ana? mayst7y 3ala wayha!!
I took out my phone and tweeted: people im not engaged, stop it with these rumors.
ZAIDS PERSPECTIVE
Tawni 6ale3 men el dawam wla raqam ghareeb dag 3alay
Me: aloo
: ushh zayon maly shghel feech batkalam
Me: alooo?
: uhhh zaid?
9ot'ha mo ghareeb
Me: eh mnnu ma3ay?
: ahh mala da3y et3arf, bas laish chethy tsawy eb 7e9a
Me: ana?
: eh enta, ya3ny may9er wala, tsolf wyaha w madre shnu 7ag fatra w akher shay tatrek'ha mn ghair sebab
Me: ana many mjawb 3ala ay shay ela etha gelteely mnu entay
: uffffff ana lulu
Me: lulu refeejat 7e9a?
Lulu: ehh, wala yawaylk engeltlaha eny daga 3alayk, ehya matadre 3an ayshay, bas ena nafseyat'ha ta3bana w malha khulg shay, kela 7asbalaha ena ehya msawya shay ghala6 eb 7agk, mo 7aram 3alaik?
Me: 7aram 3alayha ehya, ehya el makh6ooba mo ana, ana wa7d mayt feeha whya matadre 3an hawa dary
Mawa3ait wla t9arekh: ABAAAAAAAAAAAAY CUUUUUUUUUUUTEE
Me: w thowal ba6aytay ethoony, shnu cute?
Lulu: waay wayyy ma9adg, 7e9a mo makh6oba, cuuuute enta wakhart 3anha lana 7asabt enha makh6ooba?
Me: la7tha la7tha shnu mo makh6oba? Ambala makh6ooba ana sema3t'ha tgoolch bl 7adeeqa, w haman khaled dash el duwaniya w gal 7ag el kel
Lulu faj2a gamat etda3y w madre shtkharb6 3an le9bay
Lulu: 9ej mayst7y 3ala wayha!! Mo 9ej iff khalny sakta bas
Me: kel hatha w khalny sakta?:p
Lulu: jad 7ada ey777r!! ohwa ely 6ala3 el esha3a
Me: la7tha ya3ny akeed mo 9ej
Lulu: eh akeed, 7atan chayk akher tweet men tweets 7e9a
Me: okay al7en achayk, mashkora wayed ekhty lulwa, w please latgolen 7ag 7e9a ena geltch kel hal ashya
Lulu: bagolaha etha geltly lulwa mara thanya! esmy lulu... mo lulwa!!!
Me: asf asf lulu
Lulu: haha yallah bye
Me: bye
I checked 7e9a's tweets wla 6ala3 9ej mo makh6oba
Ga3adt afakr shloon ard asolf wyaha 3gb ma g6a3t 7ag thalath asabee3, ana 6ala3t 9ej ghaby, kan el mafroth at2akad bel awal, bas laish laamn geltlaha mabrook galatly allah eybark feek? Shnu 3abaalaha kan qasdy?
Atmana bas law trd 3elaqatna nafs awal, al7een akeed el bent 7qdat 3alay w krahatny
______
Here's the post, now you all probably haven't read my tweet, im gonna deactivate my account for a while, i really do need to focus on my school work, my grades are far from good, i think that leaving the blog for a while would be the best answer, but dont worry, i'm coming back again, probably 2 or 2 weeks after i deactivate. Also, a lot of you have been asking me why i haven't been posting daily as before, well i think its because i have school, almost a quiz everyday, 2 tests per week, and don't forget the homework, so yes i have a lot of stuff to work on, and it does effect my GPA. So please understand, thankyou.
